Author Archives: Broken Mama

Hey everyone I hope your 2022 has been going wonderful so far sorry I haven’t been very active as it’s been a very busy start to the year for me. My fiancé has finally gone back to work after a long few months of no work which is amazing but that also makes me a full-time mom again and not much time to myself. Thankfully I have a lot of family supporting me in around me all the time to help out when I need help, I am very fortunate to be able to live with my grandmother who is also my best friend.

My days consist of making breakfast lunch and snack time, playing hockey most of my day and trying to do fun and educational things with my son but at two years old his attention span isn’t the greatest at times. When I was 20 years old I went through a program to get my early childhood education certificates only made it through year one for the fact that if I wanted to have my own children one day even though I have stepchildren I wanted to not have to work with children all day long and then go home to my own children and not have the patience for my own. I love working with children and I love helping their minds grow and being a big influential part to their lives but I’d rather be that person for my own children. Lately more and more I have been thinking about going back to work or going back to school I love being a stay at home mom I really do but I want to be able to help my fiancé with all of the bills and saving for a house and other things we want to do. But on the other hand I am also horrified to put my son into a daycare with Covid still around his immune system is good for the most part but he also hasn’t been around a lot of kids his age because Covid came at the worst time possible. I know I may sound selfish because you know there’s a lot of parents that don’t have the option to stay home with your kids and I have been blessed with that option but I saw what daycare‘s did to my stepchildren and with the school system has been to my kids immune system‘s and I don’t want the same thing to happen to his at such a little age especially with Covid around. He is around a lot of children through my family and when he does get sick it only lasts a day or two so his immune system is strong enough to fight it off I know that much but I do have the fear of Covid constantly in my head if I were to put him in a daycare.

My fiancé and I have talked a lot about this and plan was for me to go back to school or work when he starts school but I do feel like that could be quite some time as we are trying for baby number two, if I do end up pregnant am I gonna end up doing the same thing I did with my son and stay at home until they go to school as well? I know I have been very fortunate to be able to do that but being a stay at home mom definitely is not for the weak. Being a full-time mom is a wonderful bonding time with my child I can honestly say that me and him do you have a tight relationship even at 2 1/2 years old , but there are days where I do miss getting out and doing things for myself or Going to work and getting away for the day. With a full time working man whose hours vary every day makes it very hard to be able to get out and do things on a day-to-day basis especially with how cold the winters are here and only having the one vehicle for the household.

But this year I promised to myself that this will be our year it’ll be a better year it will be a healthier year and we are going to take this year by storm. No more holding ourselves back from opportunities of greatness or opportunities of financial freedom we are going to finally try and give ourselves a life we deserve. No more living in fear and honestly no more living in fear of Covid as bad as we all have been because this is our new normal we need to get back to some kind of normalcy.

Now I hope you all have a wonderful day and you’ll be hearing from me again soon. XOXOO one broken ass mama!!!

Happy New Year to you all. I hope everyone has had an amazing holiday season and is ready for what 2022 has to offer us all. My hope is that this year will be better then the last two for sure. I know it’s been a hard two years with the pandemic but we have remained so strong this far let’s keep doing it together now. I know that is hard to do most days but I am hopeful that one day there will be a light at the end of the tunnel and we can get back to some kind of normalcy.

Happy New Year again to you all.

Xoxox one broken ass momma

So as I put in my Welcome post, you would see I am a stepmom and a mother. I have been a stepmom for just over seven years now and had my first child just over two in a half years ago now as he was born in May of 2019. So yes he was born 10 months before the pandemic fully hit us in March of 2020 but as a first time mom to my own baby I was still learning every day new things and when the pandemic hit I went into a panic mode cause I was scared of what was to be of this pandemic.

Now almost two years into this pandemic my son doesn’t know what’s regular existence is because of Covid. He goes into a store and has a mask on like everyone else and hand sanitizes as soon as we walk in any door of any shop. He doesn’t go to daycare because I have a compromised immune system so I am a stay at home mom and he has only had two colds his whole two and a half years of existence so I am scared to expose him to any massive germs as he has never had anything bigger then the sniffles. Which I’m sure most moms with covid 19 babes are scared of as well.

Even with having older children I feel horrible for them because they are struggling mentally with this pandemic not knowing when they will get to have a normal childhood again and it’s devastating. My second youngest babe has a birthday party to go to not that long ago and it was her first one since the pandemic had started and she got so excited but also overwhelmed because she was panicked of getting exposed and not knowing if she was going to get in trouble because of all the restrictions they have in place. How do you calm down a 10 year old from a panic attack because she is scared of Covid.

I wish my children could have the simpler childhood that we all got to experience. Without masks, without socially distancing and not having to live in constant fear because of what the media says and what they have to see everyday. They can’t even go to school regularly anymore… there is no more recess or cafeteria hangout spots for them to enjoy because they have to be socially distanced. They can’t go to all the big events with their schools because they have had to cancel them because of covid.

And yes I am a momma who is fully vaccinated and I know that covid is real and around, but I also am a momma who wants this to just go away so my babies can enjoy a normal existence again and enjoy being a child.

Any other mommas with me on this!

Xoxox one tired ass broken momma!!!

I am sure I am not the only one here who just feels like running away some days and no I don’t mean forever. I mean run away from reality and just have time for yourself and find your self worth and self love again. I know we are going through a pandemic and mental health has been huge for so many people since Covid poked its ugly head into our lives. But as a young mom who had her child just before the pandemic hit and raising my now toddler in this world of hand sanitizer, masks and social distancing from people we care about has been a struggle.

I know I am not the only mom out there who has felt like they are a failure to their babies or like their child would be better off with someone better as their parent. I know it’s a struggle to keep the fight going for a lot of people because they aren’t sure they are enough and or strong enough for this world, but I promise you all are. Parenting with mental health issues is never easy because there is always stuff playing through your head on a daily basis but we have little people who see us and love us everyday and those little ones are what keep us going.

In my 24 years of life I don’t remember a time when my mental health has been normal. From a young age I started having panic attacks and I mean panic attacks to the point where I would faint and be inconsolable every time. Then depression hit me like a brick wall and after many therapists and councillors and different kinds of medications nothing seemed to help other then to write and vent.

The happiest time of my life I can honestly say was when I was pregnant with my child and when he was born, he is my best friend and the reason I am still here fighting everyday. Do I regret having my child young, No. Do I regret not experiencing more in my life before having children, yes at times but I wouldn’t trade this life for anything more because then I wouldn’t have him.

Mental health is so important to take care of for everyone’s sake but especially your own. If you know you are struggling and need to cry , scream and or vent find someone who you trust to talk to and confide in, call a mean gal health line and for goodness gracious don’t be scared to reach out because you are important. Each and every single person ☺️

Until next time xoxox One broken ass momma!!!!

Hello and welcome to my blog. If you are here and reading this I am going to assume you, yourself are a mother, a stepmom or a mother figure and a tad broken in life and looking for some guidance along the way and assurance that your not the only one.

Well I am a 24 year old mother with three beautiful stepchildren and a beautiful child of my own and I can tell you I am one hot mess and very much broken in more ways the I like to admit too but not always broken in a bad way.
With having my child in 2019 and having to raise my child in this crazy world of Covid there are a lot of struggles and hardships that come with that. I am here to vent, help and give some tips on how to manage everything you may be struggling with.
In my 24 years of life I have gone through more than I would like to even admit to myself and struggle daily with depression, anxiety and eating disorders. Becoming a mother hasn’t made those problems just disappear over night they are still there everyday and coping with them isn’t always easy but I am here to remind all you other mommas who struggle that your not alone and hope you join me on this adventure.

Xoxo one broken ass momma.